Summer Lovin'
by Kiri-Kiri-chan
Summary: It's summer time! Sasuke's parents take him and his brother to the beach for some....fun? [AU] [Jealous Sasuke]FIXED! finally
1. Do not molest

**Summer Lovin' **

_Do Not Molest_

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: So its summer, Yay… **sigh**

**Chains**: Enthusiastic much?

**Kiri-Kiri-chan: **I-it's just, there are so many flies! And im getting sick of all the fly spray! **Gagging**

**Rayzo**: EW…Anyway, why don't you just close your window?

**Chaos**: 'cause that would be stupid?

**Chains**: Yea, it's summer Honey, not winter.

**Rayzo**: Oh piss off.

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Im sensing some hostility

**Chaos**: I think maybe marriage counselling is in order.

-

**Summary**: It's summer time! Sasuke's parents take him and his brother to the beach for some…..fun? AU Jealous Sasuke

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto

**R&R**: Yes please

**Warnings**: Read it and make up your own

-

I don't trust my parents right now, not one bit and I think Itachi, my brother, is thinking the same thing as I am because he is looking round the car looking for possible escape roots. There is three, the two doors and the sun roof. He looks at me and nods his head, giving me an if-they-try-anything-funny-I'll-grab-you-and-make-a-run-for-it look. He actually uses that look quite often; I call it 'Look No. 5', he has many of these looks-…why the hell am I talking about my brothers looks when im probably about to be pimped off to some rich old guy the smells of piss and rabbits?! Anyway, the reason I don't trust my parents is because, my father said, and I quote, 'Let's go to the beach and have some _fun_'. End quote. Uchiha's don't have _fun_! Fun is not in our vocabulary! Especially not in my fathers! Fun is not allowed to be had damnit!

Okay breath Sasuke, no matter what happens you can fight your way out of it! I will not be pimped off, my mother wouldn't allow it for starters and she is smiling away happily (probably on some sort of drug, but still, even high she wouldn't let anyone hurt her 'little angel', my mother is in denial most of the time) so nothing that _bad_ will happen.

I hear Itachi breath a sigh of relief and I look out my window to see what my brother is sighing at….and I see……Oh god no! How could they be so cruel as to bring me HERE?!

Where am I you ask? WHERE AM I? I am at the Hyuga Summer mansion! That snotty asshole jerk-face prissy-ass long-haired brat! I hate him! I must escape! But im locked in; as soon as my parents noticed that I have noticed where we are they locked the doors and closed the sun roof. Im locked in! IM LOCKED IN! Im doomed, im going to kill him and be sent to jail and share a jail cell with some guy named peaches and he is going to butt rape me! HE IS GOING TO BUTT RAPE ME!!!

The car stopped….okay, breath, repeat after me Sasuke! I will not Kill Neji Hyuga no matter how much that bastard pisses me off.

After about 5 minutes of that and some odd looks my way, we get out of the car, leaving our luggage in there, we don't get it, we are to rich to do manual labour. My father knocks on the door twice and I wait, slowly….waiting….waiting …..Wait- OPEN THE GOD DAMN DOOR!!

The door slowly opens and Neji's cousin…erm…..her name is…..

"Why, Hinata, it is so nice to see you again! My haven't you grown from that little ten year old girl I once knew!" My mother is really that sweet, seriously, every word of hers just drips of real sugar. I wonder why she married my father. Oh and her name is Hinata, and whoa, that girl _has_ grown and in all the right places to. I would hit on her if I wasn't gay.

"T-Thank y-you m-m-Mrs Uchiha." That girl is still as shy as ever, I don't remember much about her but what I do remember is that she likes cute things and is very shy. I never spent to much time with her. But sadly, I had to spend a lot of time with her damn cousin who looks more like a girl than she does. "P-please come i-i-in!"

So we walk into the huge place and yeah its nice but I don't care. I just want to go into my room and not come out until this nightmare of a summer is over! I want to see as little as Neji as possible. Oh and crap, speak of the devil and he shall appear. Neji walks down the stairs in black shorts and a white top! I was going to wear that! He spoils EVERYTHING!!!

"Hello Sasuke, how have you been?" He asks me very politely, I hate him! I hate him so fucking much.

"I've been quite well thank you, and you Neji?" Say your dying Neji, please, just says your dying of an incurable illness!

"Very good thank you!" Damn I hate him! That guy has _no_ pupils either! It's just white eyes like he is blind or something, which he isn't! Great, now he is talking to my parents. Neji looks at Itachi and asks him how he is, Itachi just nods his head. Itachi isn't very…social? In fact, he hates most people. Loud people, stupid people…Happy people.

"Sasuke, why don't you get changed so Neji can take you and Itachi down to the beach." Whoa, my mother is feeling way to happy today. First, Itachi does not do sun. He likes to stay in the shadows wallowing in his own existence. Okay, so he doesn't wallow, but he probably plots or something. And second, she knows I hate Neji! She knows it because I tell her whenever she brings him up! Its goes something like this:

"Neji is-"

"I HATE NEJI!"

And then she just finishes what she is saying as if I never spoke, but still, she knows I loath him to the pits of hell! HELL I SAY! HELL!!!!!

"Sasuke, dear, are you okay?" Oh yeah, I forgot about the whole, standing in the middle of the room and glaring at Neji wasn't the best thing to do. I just nod and go up to my room. My room is the same as always. Go up the stairs, turn left then right and it's the third door to the left. My stuff as already been un-packed and my bag us already been put away.

Now I need to find something to wear because SOMEONE stole my idea! Damn him! I wanted to wear my black shorts! Now I have to wear my white shorts with my black top! God I am so unhappy now! Those shorts looked good on me, on Neji they look terrible. That bastard.

So much for my summer holiday.

-

So we go down to the beach, some girls are looking at me and Itachi but whatever. Not interested, they all look like sluts. Neji is walking a little head of us because me and Itachi don't walk fast, we take our time! Because we are Uchiha's and we aren't in a hurry for anything damnit!

"Naruto? Hey, how have you been?" Neji is talking to someone, yay; I don't care so I don't look at this 'Naruto' person. Oh look, the sea. No way in hell I'm getting in there. People piss any there and have sex and other stuff. Would you swim around in someone's piss? No, you would not.

"-my friend Naruto." Oh, Neji was talking to me and Itachi; I look up at Itachi who is currently smirking down at this 'Naruto' guy. I turn to look at him and-

SWEET JESUS!!

This guy is….so….fucking…..cute! He has bright blond hair and the bluest eyes I have _ever_ seen in my whole life! And his skin looks so soft and touchable; he must be out in the sun a lot because it looks very nicely tanned. Wow, this guy is so fuckable.

And his top says 'Do Not Molest'

Ha, try and stop me!


	2. Lollipops shouldn’t do that

**Summer Lovin' **

_Lollipops shouldn't do that…_

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Hello my loves, I just saw the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie, it was awesome!! Second, the review Naruto's girl sent me…I'm so sorry, I really am, but….Sasuke is going to go after Naruto and Naruto is going to fall in love with Sasuke.

**Rayzo**: And have man babies-

**Kiri-Kiri-chan: **NO! But please feel free to rip Sasuke up into tiny pieces of bleeding flesh that slowly rot away while crows beck at his decaying eye balls.

**Chains**: That's descriptive.

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Meh, I have a lot of free time.

**Chaos**: Thought about it before, huh?

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Pretty much. Anyway, shall we start the story? Oh, and sorry Sasuke fan's.

-

**Summary**: Sasuke isn't a slut; he just has a lot of emotions that he needs to….share.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto's booty.

**R&R**: Yes please, of and thank you for those who reviewed the last chapter.

**Warnings**: Yaoi….exploding lollypops, you'll understand when you read it.

**Apologies**: I am so very sorry for the poor spelling. My god, I dint no I misspelled so many words! I am so very ashamed! Oh and Sasuke is wearing white shots and a black shirt! God, I am so sorry! Please, feel free to kill me. I deserve it.

-

Three words:

Must

Fuck

Blond

This boy is to hot and just so fucking cute and he practically screams 'uke'. Naruto is the cream to my ice, the blue to my sky and the uke to my seme! I can see it now, _'Sasuke, do you love me?_' Awww that would be so cute! Looking up at me with big blue eyes…on his knees…in front of me…. _'Sasuke….it hurts_' or, _'Harder Sasuke!'_ hell yes!! Or maybe even _'No…Sasuke, im…embarrassed…'_

Must

Fuck

Blond

Now

It is now four words now. Man I am so horny now and the blond is just sitting there….eating an ice lolly. Oh god that should be illegal! Ah, my dick is starting to hurt- HEY! What the fuck does NEJI think he is doing to MY blond?! Yes, MINE!! I don't care if Neji has known him longer; it's just a number-

Oh

My

Fucking

God!

Now that _HAS_ to be illegal! Naruto just bit into the lollypop and ice cream shot out of it and onto his face! Someone wants me to have a heart attack….or my dick to explode 'cause it feels like it is gunna do that any fuckin' second now!!

Neji looks like his dick might explode to, I hope it fuckin does. He might die. Oh! Now I have an idea.

Neji dies and Naruto is all scared and shit 'cause Neji's dead bleeding corpse is right in front of Naruto's cute little self and Naruto is all like, _'S-Sasuke! Protect me from the ugly smoking Neji corpse!'_ and because I'm such a nice guy I will say, _'Of course Naruto my love, now come into my waiting arms of my eternal love for you!'_ And then we will run off into the sunset or something. I'm just hoping that wherever we run off to has a bed. Wait, scratch that. Just some place that nobody will distract us. I wonder what it would be like to fuck Naruto against a wall….His face flushed, moaning and panting…screaming my name!!

…..Do I sound like some weird stalker?

I do? Okay just wanted to clear that up before I start my rant again – oh hey, Naruto is talking to me! Yay, wait, maybe I should listen….be a good idea.

"-So you wanna come?" Oh you have no idea Naruto, I want to come all over- Wait, am I going somewhere?

"Go where? Sorry, I got a little distracted." I was thinking about what you could replace that ice-cream filled lollypop with…

"My friend is having a beach party tonight; I was asking if you wanted to come?" The blond smiled brightly at me.

Is he asking me out on a date?! Then yes! YES, YES, YES OH GOD YES!!

"Sure, why not?" I smirked that smirk that no girl or guy can resist.

"Great! You can meet my girlfriend!" Great, I am so-…

….

WHAT?!?!

He has a girlfriend?! WHY?! He should have kept himself for me!! I am his one true love! HIS ONE TRUE FUCKING LOVE!!!

Okay, breathe Sasuke, it is no big deal, I can get his girlfriend to dump him and then I can let him cry on my shoulder, it will go something like this:

_Sasuke's inner mind_:

"She broke up with me Sasuke! Oh I am so depressed, I will never fall in love with anyone again, unless, some really hot person comes along who is just so awesome I can't resist that person and fall madly in love with that person, but what are the chances of that happening, Sasuke?"

"Naruto, you dobe, I love you."

"Y-you do Sasuke?"

"Of course."

"Oh Sasuke, please make sweet passionate homosexual love with me!!"

_End Sasuke's inner mind_

Heh, oh yea, that's how it's gunna happen! He will be so in love with me!

"Hey Sasuke, how comes you are drooling?" Neji asks me, that fucking poof!

"Shut up…" Man I hate him. And when Naruto and I become a couple Neji will be so upset he will kill himself! Hahahahaha…. Okay, maybe that won't happen but still, cant a guy dream?!

"Little brother," I look up at Itachi who is smirking at me, "You are so foolish." What the- "He won't fall in love with you just like that."

…

…

Has he been reading my mind?

"Besides, it is quite obvious Neji likes him and the blond hasn't figured it out yet and they have been friends for 2 years." How does he know that? "Naruto told me." STOP READING MY MIND ITACHI!! That is an invasion of privacy!!

Wait, Naruto doesn't realize that Neji likes him? What is he, stupid?

"Naruto, you have some ice cream on face." Neji slides an elegant finger down Naruto's check and licks it off, giving Naruto the sexiest look possible. I was about to kill the Hyuga, before:

"Thanks buddy!" The blond smacks Neji playfully on the shoulder and continues to talk to Itachi about ramen.

Oh god, the blond is a fucking retard!!

How stupid can one person be?! It wouldn't have been more obvious if Neji just came right out and kissed Naruto on the lips, tongues and all.

Oh great, I like a compete moron.


	3. POV

**Summer Lovin'**

_Finding the right mind_

**Kiri-kiri-chan**: So thanks for the reviews! Means a lot to me! And thank you htotheizzo for giving me the inspiration for this chapter!

**Chains**: Can I be in the story?

**Rayzo**: Me two!

**Chaos**: Me three!

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: ….NO!

**Chains**: Bitch….

**Rayzo**: Mean!!

**Chaos**: Maybe you should ask the people that review the story!

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: ….. **Sigh** fine. If you want these three **points to Rayzo, Chains and Chaos** to be in the next chapter, say (YES OC) OR (NO OC) in your review

**Chains**: …. I have a bad feeling that nobody will want us

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Hopefully….

-

**Summary**: Whose POV is it in again?!?

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Naruto's lady lumps

**Warning**: You should already no what I say to this part, but in case you forgot. Read it and make up your own!

**R&R**: Yes please, and remember (YES OC) or (NO OC)

-

**S A S U K E: POV**

He is so fucking hot! I want him; I will screw his brains out so hard! But he has a girlfriend!!! AND HE IS AN **IDIOT!!** Why do I have such bad luck? First I have to hang around **him** all the time, then I find out Naruto is an **idiot** and to top it all off, he has a girlfriend! Naruto, my love, my darling, why are you not gay?! You must be in the closet, its okay baby! We can face the world together! We can shout to the world, _'NARUTO IS SASUKE'S UKE!'_ Why is fate so cruel my oh so uke-a-licious Naruto? What have I ever done wrong? Apart from trying to kill Neji on several occasions, but is that really a crime?

It is?

Oh…well….i didn't do it?

Oh yea, back to the whole Naruto is mine thing! He is mine by the way, you take him from me and I kill! KILL!!! KILL I SAY! Blood, blood, blood, bloooooooooooooooooooooooooooood-

-

Because Sasuke is obviously going threw some…..issues, we will have to switch POV

-

**N E J I: POV**

Fate, the one word that brings my heart closer to my blue eyed fox, he and I are destined to be together and become _one_. His beauty is one that no human can rival, even the most stunning gods envoy his unique face and body. His heart is made from the purest gold, his heart is a lock, and only one person who holds the key to unlock his golden heart, and only I, Neji Hyuga, have the key to the blond's heart-

Why does Sasuke look like he is going to have a heart attack? I really worry about him sometimes; he always seems so angry and full of hate. As his best friend, I will one day cure the anger he holds in his heart!!! But first I must get Naruto to fall in love with me.

Why is he so stupid? But that is one of the things that make's him so cute. When he looks up at me, curiosity written all over his face….

"Neji, your nose is bleeding!!" WHY FATE?! WHY MUST I SIN MYSELF WITH THESE…..these….perverted thoughts. Oh Naruto, my Naruto, why do you drive me so crazy?

"Here Neji." Naruto gets a tissue from his pocket and hands it to me, smiling ever so slightly, his golden hair blowing in the wind, the sun softly setting in the background…

Everything is perfect; I should tell him my feelings now….Everything is just right-

"HEY NEJI, remember the time you fell over and landed face fist into some dog-" Sasuke!!

"Shut up Sasuke!!" Why would my friend bring up such a thing at a time like this?! Sometimes that guy acts like he hates me. I wonder why….

"Oh _sorry_ Neji." Oh Sasuke, you don't have to say sorry!! Isn't that what that one song says? Some……friendship …dun, dun … not having to say you're sorry…lalalala… Wait, I think its love, oh never mind.

"It's okay Sasuke; I know you didn't mean it." I hope Sasuke doesn't grow up like Itachi, that man is so cold and is probably always plotting _something_.

Oh, Naruto looks so happy right now, I love it when he is happy because then I get happy and when I'm happy the world just seems to smile back like one big happy-

-

Lets…..just move on back to Sasuke…

-

**S A S U K E**: **POV**

I am **NOT** happy!! That bastard I hate him! Damn you Neji! Damn you to hell and back so I can damn you again and again and again and again!! What the fuck is Itachi doing just standing their anyways?! He's plotting something!!

WHAT THE FUCK!! NEJI REMOVE YOUR HANDS! Naruto is my property!! I hate him, must kill, must kill must-

-

Right……..Maybe we should just go see what Naruto thinks

-

**N A R U T O**: **POV**

Sasuke is weird; he keeps looking at me like he is gunna eat me! WERDIO!! Oh look, shinny things, ahahahaha! I like shinny things!

Ramen isn't shinny though, but I love Raman still, miso Ramen is yummy!! I want some Ramen now-

SHINNY! Shinny, shinny, shinny! I wonder what that shinny thing is….Oh, it's Sakura's forehead! Hiiiiii Sakura!!! Oh, I said that in my mind! Oops, oh well she's gone now, I wonder who that guy is-

Itachi looks like he is plotting! Maybe I should stay away from him….i want another lollypop!

OH, look, shinny, shinny, shinny-

-

Poor, poor Naruto. Maybe we should find out what Itachi is _actually_ thinking, hm?

-

**I T A C H I: POV **

I think I should change my shampoo, my hair is already very beautiful and shinny and soft. But it could be _more_ shinny and soft. Yes, I think I will. Oh and I _must_ paint my nails again today, I cannot believe I chipped it!! God, that was so depressing, I cried for 5 hours in my head. I can't let anybody see me cry for real or they might think I was some cry baby-

Ah!! Nooooooooo! I chipped some more! Oh, why lord, why have you forsaken me?! What have I ever done wrong-!

-

I guess he wasn't plotting then….


	4. So that’s your girlfriend

**Summer Lovin'**

_So that's your girlfriend_

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Hello meh lovhs! Thank you for all your reviews!! Okay, two things,

1. Naruto's girl: You no, your reviews actually kind of scare me…. But anyway, I'm sorry again, Naruto will fall in love with Sasuke, and Neji might get a little action from Naruto, who knows?

2. Htotheizzo is the best, she's my muse! So I put her in my story Kukuku!! All go thank Htotheizzo with lots of cookies!

**Rayzo**: Does Naruto's girl actually scare you with her reviews?

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: **nods**, but she is still nice enough to review and ask for updates so it isn't all that bad! Thank you Naruto's girl you crazy lil muffin you.

**Chains**: Muffin-?

**Chaos**: Kiri-Kiri-Sama, **hears cheers from Kiri-Kiri in the background for being called 'sama'**, would like to say, to people reading her other story 'Flowers in the Moon', she is typing that up and should be out son Sunday or closer.

**Kiri-Kiri-Sama**:-

**Chains**: Don't kid yourself; no one else respects you-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Bitch, anyway, lately I have been updating this story so fast! And don't think just because I have been updating fast does not mean I don't put effort into my stories!! **Tears of waterfalls** I PUT SO MUCH WORK INTO MY LITTLE ANGLES!!!

**Chaos**: **Whips a huge flag up in the air that says **_**'Summer Lovin'**_** on it** Let the story **Brings the huge flag crashing threw the air** COMMENCE!!!

**Kiri-kiri-chan**: Hey Htotheizzo, I changed your name to Kyuubi, so it's not an OC, but I'm putting you into that OC, if ya get me.

-

N o r m a l: POV, 'cause everybody's mind so messed up, Sasuke needs about 10 years on the 'couch', Itachi needs to get over his nail polish thing and Naruto needs a new brain, wait no, he _needs_ a brain.

-

Naruto was happily licking away at his lollypop, all three people looking at him thinking more or les the same thing in their evil little minds of doom:

_Sasuke: That's it, lick that lolly bitch, oh yea, harder, harder, you can do it my little-_

_Neji: Naruto, my love, why do you torture me with your lovely pink tongue? Oh fate, why do you have to be so cruel? But I no everything happens for a reason, oh, I no! He is licking that so his tongue is nice and tasty for when I give him a kiss, Awww, Naruto, you're so kind._

_Itachi: I like the colour of his lollypop, baby blue would look very nice on my nails, hmm, yes I think it will, I have to go shopping, oh, but all the shops will be closed by now! Oh god, here comes the water works again_

_Sasuke: ORGASM_

Their thoughts were plagued with one adorable blond and his lollypop, oh, the torture they had to withstand because of that little blond. Sasuke that poor, poor man had to masturbate for 3 whole hours to take care of his little - I mean big – problem. But then he fell into a deep sleep, thinking of his one true love, wanting to 'Stick the hot dog into some buns'. A cold shower did nothing for the younger Uchiha, and masturbating now seemed so pointless to him, he wanted to 'Stick a hot dog into some buns', not 'stick a hot dog into his hand'. Oh that poor brave man, how does he do it? Now Sasuke is so full of sexual frustration he thinks he might just explode, and it's only been one day.

Itachi, the poor little cry baby, cried for the whole night about not getting his baby blue nail polish, his heart was broken, his soul shattered at his pain of having no nail polish to fill his soul and turn it the beautiful colour of the sky that lifts our souls at its beautifulness. Oh, the pain Itachi had to go threw that night was something no man should ever go threw again.

Neji, the poor soul, fell over right in front of Naruto; he was so embarrassed,

**N E J I: POV**

WOE IS ME! Fate, you are a cruel temptress, WHY FATE!!!! Am I not allowed to be with the one that I belong with? Why torture my soul?! WHY TOUTURE MY SOUL?!?! Naruto FORGIVE ME!!!!

**N E J I: POV end**

Naruto on the other hand thought that Neji falling over was the funniest thing ever and had no idea two gorgeous men were lusting over him so badly, oh no, it wasn't lust, no, its love. Sasuke's thought aren't of lust, just love.

**S A S U K E: POV**

Oh I will fuck him so hard the bed will broke!! I want him now! Now, hard!!!!

**S A S U K E: POV end**

Yep, no lustful thinking their.

-

**BEACH PARTY TIME!!!!**

"Hey Sasuke, Neji and Itachi, how have you guys been?" Naruto smiles widely at them, he took Sasuke's hand and dragged him away from the others, "Come on guys, I don't wanna be late!"

**S A S U K E**: **POV**

Hes holding my hand! Yes, he **must** love me! He also called out my name first, it means something!! But Itachi's name was last; nobody ever puts his name last, but I don't think Itachi noticed, he's been really depressed lately, I don't know why, maybe his plotting didn't work out. Oh well, wow, Naruto's hand is so soft. I would just love to hold him close into my arms, oh sigh, Naruto; you are so beautiful and just so FUCKABLE!! YEAAAAH!!

So, we're going to a beach party, I can already hear the noise and see all the lights, I hope its good- wait! I don't have time to enjoy myself; I have to find out who Naruto's girlfriend is and kill her. . . . Okay, maybe not _kill_ but, something along the lines of that. Kukuku, oh, Naruto, what I will do for you and our LOVE!!

**S A S U K E: POV end**

They got to the party, Naruto dragging Sasuke the whole way.

**N E J I: POV**

N-Naruto, why do you hold Sasuke's hand? I shouldn't be jealous but I am, he's my friend so I no he wont do anything to you, but, do you like him my love? Please say no, I will forever give you my gratitude if you say no.

"Hey, Naruto-" But I get cut off from talking to my Naruto because he ran off and jumped onto his _girlfriend_, how I hate his _girlfriend_!!

**NEJI: POV end**

Naruto grabbed hold of his girlfriend with all his might, still holding onto Sasuke. Too bad that had different ideas as to why.

_Sasuke: He isn't letting go, that must mean something!_

_Naruto_: _Yay! I haven't seen- hey wait, Im still holing Sasuke's hand, ahahahaha, oops! Maybe I should let go- oh shiny things!!!_

Yes, two very different ideas.

"Hey guys, this is my girlfriend, SAY HELLO Haku!"

_Sasuke: Narutoooo, what about me?_

_Neji: I hate that guy_

_Itachi: He has blue nail polish. . ._

Itachi wondered off to go talk to the guy with the nail polish he had been lacking for over two hours! Gah, painful!

"So, that's your girlfriend?" Naruto nodded his head at Sasuke's question.

"Haku, this is Neji – you already no him - and Sasuke! The other guy that was _just_ went over there to talk to the guy with blue nail polish because he has wanted it for over two hours now is Itachi!" Sasuke rolled his eyes, Naruto was so stupid.

"Hello everyone. It's nice to meet you Sasuke. Oh and I must inform you that I am not a girl-"

_Sasuke: WHAT?! And I thought Naruto looked girly. . ._

"And neither am I his girlfriend, we are just very close friends." Haku smiled brightly at his hopefully new friends.

"Haku, I'm bored, why did you drag me here?" A huge man with…grey? Skin came walking up behind Haku, he did _not_ look all too happy.

"That's my boyfriend, Zabuza."

_Neji & Sasuke: Paedophile. . . ._

"Haku is 19 and Zabuza is 22!" Naruto said happily, dancing around to the music. His hips swinging the music-

_Sasuke_: _Mmm, you are __**so**__ fine Naruto_

A tall women watched them all from the shadows, laughing evilly to herself, in a blink of an eye she was behind Sasuke, laughing, ready to pounce –

"AH! YOU IDIOT! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH MY FACE COST ME!!" She screamed down at Sasuke, who had at _that_ very moment lifted his arm up and punched her in the face.

"Wha-?"

"BASTARD!" She grabbed him by the head and threw him hard into the hand. Then, after a few breathing exercises, "Hi Naruto, long time no see!"

"Kyuubi!" Naruto ran up and hugged his sister. "Sis, it's been ages!"

"Yes, it has. Is Neji still fucking you with his eyes?" She asked happily, why Sasuke lay bleeding on the floor.

"You're so silly Kyuubi!"

_Neji_: _Naruto_. . . .

Kyuubi stood at 6ft 1, she had long flowing red hair, her skin was as pale as paper and her eyes were as green as the ocean. She was the most beautiful women you may ever have the pleasure to meet. Also the most violent you may have the pleasure to meet.

**S A S U KE: POV**

I'm going to die, and I will never get the chance to tell Naruto-

". . .I love him"

Hey, im bleeding. Itachi you asshole, get back here and safe me you dick!!

**S A S U KE: POV end**

That night, Sasuke slept on the ground, Neji was still the best friend, Itachi got his nail polish, Naruto got drunk and finally got to hold of something shiny and Kyuubi nearly killed 5 people. So all in all, a good night.


	5. Pink, Pink, Poodle

**Summer Lovin'**

_Pink, Pink, Poodle_

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Okay, I just need to say a few tings before we start thing:

1. Naruto's girl, awwwwwwwww your sooooooooooooo cuuuttteeeee **huuuugs**

2. Htotheizzo, thank you again my lovely muse!! **Hugs, **Wub yuw!!

3. No No 22, yay, I love you, your awesome and always so nice!! How are your ribs by the way? Heh

4. LeperchaunPimpSlap, Chuuuu!!! You are soooo C.U.T.E! **KILLS WITH HUGS**!!

5. I was pissed off by this one review; I don't take kindly to being called an idiot. I tried to e-mail you but it didn't work, so I'm going to have to tell you what I said here.

The sea is green; it is a lot of colours if you just take the time to actually look at it, it really depends on where you are in the world, the sea gets greener in different places. And have you **ever** heard of the colour 'Sea green'?

The ocean is not **just blue** okay? And, don't you _dare_ ever insult my intelligence again; I do know what I am talking about.

Oh, and just because you know a few Japanese words, you shouldn't just use them at random; it is an insult to the language.

6. Darkneko666, Thank you, you're awesome

7. THANK YOU FOR EVERYBODY WHO REVIEWED! Except the person who called me an idiot, but thanks for reading my story anyway.

-

**Summary**: There are things about Itachi you would have never guessed.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto, but I wish I did **sigh**

**Warnings**: Pink, heh.

**R&R**: Yes please **big smile**

-

"Hey Sasuke, how are you feeling?" I look up at Naruto and smile, ah, he is so beautiful in the morning- Hey, wait, is he in my bed….?

YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YESSSSSSSS!!

"Sa-us-ke?" Naruto tilts his head to the side and looks down at me oddly, and then I realize, hes on top of me.

Breathe, I must, breathe!! Oh, he is so cute right now! But, he should be on the bottom, why is he on top? Tsk, tsk, looks like I'm going to have to punish my little Naruto-

"SASUKE, are you okaaaay?" Naruto pounces up and down on my hips, oh, that's so good, a little harder please Naruto. Oh yea, also, be a dear and get off of me and get on your hands and knees so I can slam my-

"Hey, are you listening to me?!" Naruto stops pounces and pouts at me, "Bastard…" He mumbled out angrily, but, his pout is just so cute that I just wanna-

Bastard?!

BASTARD?!

I'll show that idiot, he shouldn't call his seme names!! So I lift him up and throw him onto his back and get onto his hips. Oh yea, how d'ya like me now?

"Don't call me a bastard you little idiot." I glare down coldly at the love of my life, but he doesn't seem scared, he just smirks! Damn idiot, why isn't he cowering yet?! Naruto, you better cower or I will never have sex with you!!

…Okay, maybe not, but if you don't cower I'll do something else really bad and sexy. Hm, I wonder what you look like in leather.

"Wanna go find Neji?" Wha? Na-ru-toooo! Why are you so cruel that totally just killed my hard-on. Oh sigh, maybe if I move my hips into his- "It will be fun!" He pulls me off him, not 'cause hes strong or anything, I was just still sad about him talking about Neji while I was trying to seduce my lovely little blond. "Hey, Sasuke, looks like you got a _little_ problem their!" Naruto snickers and points to my groin. Hm, maybe Neji wasn't that much of a kill join after all. Naruto can probably turn any straight man gay-

LITTLE?!?!

"I have you no that my _'problem'_ is no were close to being little!"

"Whatever, come on, get dressed, dressed, dressed my Sasuke! I have a whole day of fun planed for us!" Us? As in me and you, Naruto? And, im yours? Oh, I see, go on, you can ask me, I don't mind. Or do you want me to ask, "You're my new best friend!" What…? Best friend? Why the hell not BOYFRIEND? Oh Naruto, I really hate you sometimes

"Whatever." Okay, so, he doesn't want me as a boyfriend _yet_. But I have a way for him to _want_ me. An easy way really, all I have to do is get undressed in front of my little blond. Heh, he won't be able to resist.

So I _slowly_ take off the t-shirt I was wearing for bed, _slowly_-

"Will you hurry the hell up?! Gawd, you are _so_ slowly Sasuke-bastard!" He shouts, going threw my draws and throwing some clothes at me that I clumsily - I mean gracefully - catch in my arms.

How can I seduce him into loving me if he is so god damn impatient?! Stupid, stupid, stupid boy! He gives a bad name for blonds everywhere!! Why the hell do I like him again?!

"Please Sasuke, Naru-chan is bored!" Naruto pouts a little and bits his lower lip, looking up at me with the cutest look imaginable.

Oh, yeah, that's why I like the blond, heh.

"Okay, im getting dressed." Oh sigh, so my first plan of the day has been ruined by my love's cuteness. But who can blame me? He is one cute blond. And what I wouldn't do just to slide my d-

"Great! Now, hurry, hurry, hurry Sasuke-bastard!!" Naruto sings, dancing around my room, throwing clothes everywhere. Aw, Naruto you are just so _cute_.

"Pick my clothes up idiot while I go shower!"

"Don't call me that, bastard!" He throws a towel at me and continues to dance around. Meh, I don't really care. Not's like I have to clean it up or anything. Shower time, maybe Naruto would like to join me, hm?

"Would you like to join me in the shower idiot? You do smell a little-" Ah crap, I shouldn't of said that when he turns to give me an angry look, fire in his cute little blue eyes and his cute little fist clenching at his cute little side, Aw, he is so cute!

"Bastard!!" Naruto grabbed hold of me and threw me threw the bathroom door, nearly causing me to _die_. But because I'm so stubborn I sit up and glare at him and slam the door before passing out, my last thought, 'Aw, he is so cute!' of course!

-

**N A R U TO: POV**

Man, Sasuke is just so weird, but I like him anyways. I think him and me should be best buddies! He's also really hot, yay!! And his hair is soooo shiny! Neji's hair is shiny too; I hope Sasuke-bastard hurries up, I am so bored! I think I wanna go see Itachi to, he's so funny!

I think my friend, Deidara, will like him! Deidara has shiny hair to! So does Haku! It was great seeing my **best** girlfriend again! It had been ages and ages and ages!

What is taking Sasuke _so_ long to have a shower? He is probably one of those guys that need to wash every single hair on his head! Heh, stupid bastard.

Hey, lookie, lookie what Naru-chan found! Foundation? Hahahahaha, man that guy is so **gay**!!! Oh, and eye liner and blush? And I thought Haku wore a lot of make-up!

Sasuke has a whole make-up box! Heh, loser.

OOOOOH! SHINY THINGS!

What would Sasuke need **this**?! Whoa, this thing is **huge**! Hm, I wonder what _this_ button does-

AHHH! It's vibrating!!

Sasuke you freak!

OOH, I found another one! Yay! Why does this on have a rabbits head? Oooh! Bottoms!! Must press!!

Mmmm, this bunny one warms up, it feels kinda nice. Warm and vibrating, heh. Hmmm, I wonder if I could use this on my back.

Hm, this enlarges-? Gah, I can't read it! It has white smudges all over it! Why does Sasuke have all these balls on a string? Man, this guy is really weird, should I become friends with him?-

Ah, that bunny is still all warm, heh, it's nice. What was I thinking again?

Ah, this one is shiny! Yay, Sasuke you have so many pretty things! A lot of them vibrate and heat up. Hm, whats **this** sticky stuff, it smells kind of weird. Maybe Sasuke uses it to keep his skin soft? Probably, he is **such** a girlie-man! Heh! Oh, chocolate sauce! Why does he have **this**? It doesn't mater!!

TIME TO DIG IN!! Yum, yum!

-

**S A S U K E: POV**

After my unfortunate fainting accident I finally had my shower. I feel much better now, ah, clean and dressed! What I lovely thing. Naruto is probably still in my room looking threw my things-

Whats that vibrating sound?

Oh… God no! Please don't say he found my _treasure_?

Not good! Not good! He will probably think I am some sort of freak or something!! Okay, just stay calm, I can explain this, _'the maids must have switched my bags with Itachi's_'? Will that work? He is an idiot so hopefully it will!

I open the door, slowly, ever so slowly to see Naruto eating my chocolate sauce, ah! That stuff cost a lot you moron!! Not that I cannot afford to buy that stuff a million times over again. It's just, he just wasted it all. That cute little pig.

"Oh, hey Sasuke finally cleaned and dressed? Good! This stuff you have is so cool Sasuke! I'm not sure what it is, but I like it! Can I keep some?" Is, is he **that** stupid? It must be a trap or something…

But he is just sitting their, on the floor…with all my….. _Things_ surrounding him….Oh Naruto, you stupid, stupid boy.

-

"Come on, let's go wake up your brother first!" Meh, whatever, I don't care-

Wait…NO!! NARUTO DON'T!! YOU CAN'T DIE YET!! I HAVENT FUCKED YOU YET!!!

Itachi is not a morning person, no way, no, he is a bad when it comes to waking up!! He gets so angry!! I have to save him!!

"Naruto- hey, where'd you go?" Oh fuck.

I run to my brother's room and make it just in time to see my little cute love about to open Itachi's door. "No, Naruto it's dangerous!" I jump on my little sweetheart to stop him opening the door, but shit! Too late! We both fall threw the room and onto the floor!

Oh, Naruto. You moron, it's been nice undressing you with my eyes-

What

The

FUCK!!

"Little brother-"

Why the hell is Itachi-?

"Naruto-"

My brother Itachi, one of the most scariest person I no-

"What are you _doing_ in _my_ room?!"

In a pink bikini?

-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: XD, I was going to be mean to Neji in this chapter but I changed my mind! Heh.

**Chains**: You're so mean

**Rayzo**: Very harsh

**Chaos**: He's gunna kill you for this.

**Itachi**: You bitch!!

**Chaos**: Told ya

**Itachi**: Pink is _not_ my colour! Purple suits me better damnit!!

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Ah, sorry, sorry.


	6. Crazy old gypsy women

**Summer Lovin'**

_Crazy old gypsy women_

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Have you heard the remix of The Phantom of the Opera? Awesome

**Chains**: The remix of 'Cold' by crossfade is good.

**Chaos**: I like the remix of 'Poison' by Alice cooper

**Rayzo**: Some of the women in rock music could do Opera I bet

**Chains**: Like who?

**Chaos**: Sharon Janny den Adel

**Rayzo**: Tarja Turunen

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Lacuna Coil and shall we not forget Amy lee. Anyway, this has nothing to do with the story!

-

**Summary**: Life, as questionable as Orichimaru's sexuality.

-

Naruto Uzumaki, it just rolls of the tongue. Mmm, Naruto's tongue…..

**Cure naughty thoughts**

Anyway, enough about Naruto's soft, warm, wet, pink…..Tongue……

**Cure more naughty thoughts**

I don't think I will be able to move on from this point…..Hm, I don't think Naruto can bend that way….Anyway, what was I talking about again (apart from Naruto's delicious tongue)…..wait, I wasn't talking about anything, damnit. Should I just start again?

Naruto Uzumaki, it just rolls of the tongue doesn't it? He and I have been best friends for over a week now. It is so disheartening, why does he have to be so dense? How many times was he dropped on the head as a child? Im guessing a lot, I feel sorry for his parents.

Come to think of it, Naruto has never talked about his parents or any other family members. Maybe he is ashamed.

I look over at Itachi who is trying on the lipstick Naruto is picking out for him.

Oh Naruto, I understand your pain. But do you have to add to the embarrassment I have for my family members, particularly Itachi?

I see Naruto handing Itachi some eyeliner and feel like I might cry. My brother denies that he likes to cross-dress, but the guy is wearing a skirt and putting on make up for fuck sakes!

Naruto doesn't seem to mind though, maybe he knows some cross dressers? I wouldn't be surprised, that Haku _guy_ looked like he liked to put on some frilly outfit and make his boyfriend pound into him. Weirdo

"Hey Sasuke, what do you think?" I turn to look at Naruto and my _god_ do I want to fuck him so hard right now!

He is wearing a pretty blue summer dress and has some weird girly clip thingy in his hair. Awww, Naruto you are soooo cute!! I want to pound so hard into you while you're wearing that dress! Heh that would be so hot.

"Y-you look o-okay." Well done Sasuke, very cool. Man, why does Naruto have to be so fucking _cute_ all the damn time?! And he is making it _worse_ wearing that stupid dress! Take it off now Naruto!!

**Cure Naughty thoughts**

Heh, shall I help you my love? Those things can be hard to get out of – Not that I know or anything….

"Neji, are you okay?!" Naruto runs over to Neji who is currently on the floor, his nose bleeding and his eyes glazed over.

Oh, did I forget to mention we are in a shop? I did? Sorry about that, I sometimes have a one tract mind.

Anyway, Naruto – _my_ Naruto – just ran over to that bastard Neji to help him up from the floor. Neji is trying hard to hide the blush rising but is doing a piss-poor job of it. Poor Neji, he doesn't realize that Naruto will _never_ fuck him! AHA! Bastard, that's right, Naruto is _my_ bitch. Anyway, while Naruto is trying help Neji up from the shop floor Neji tried to look away from Naruto, insisting he was fine Naruto, leave Neji ALLLOOOONNNNEE and come play with Sasuke! He needs some lovin'!

"Did you just say something Sasuke?" fuck, did I just say that out loud?

"No, why?" I just want to thank Itachi for teaching me the 'I-am-so-not-bothered' voice.

"'Cause you mumbled something under your breathe." Hm, Naruto looks nice down on his knees, too bad he is on his knees helping Neji up, asshole.

"Did i?" When trying to avoid a question from a moron, ask said moron a question to confuse said moron.

"You did. . .?" See, now Naruto looks all cute and confused. My plan is working perfectly. Sometimes I even impress myself. Oh crap, I just realized I am acting like I don't care what Naruto is saying!! He now must think I don't like him! NOOOO! Naruto, I do! I want to fuck YOOOOOOU!! My life sucks! And when will Neji _stop_ looking _and_ touching _my_ Naruto?! Bastard, stop looking at my dress-wearing Naruto, do you hear me slut?!?! I hope you are telepathically getting this you bitch!!

"I have a strange feeling someone is wishing me dead. . ." Neji whispers to himself more than anyone. Hah, that's right you freak, I'm wishing you _dead_!

"Little brother." I turn to Itachi who has now no make-up on and is back to wearing men's clothes. Finally, I was wondering how long I was going to have to keep the 'stay at least one metre away from Itachi at all times' thing. "You do realize you have been mumbling to yourself right?"

I have. . .? Oh crap, no wonder Naruto and Neji are looking at me like I have had one to many drinks. But I haven't been drinking, just to let you know.

Naruto must think I'm so weird insane freak now. He will never let me have my dirty way with him now!!

I'll take a page from Neji's book:

Oh Fate, why are you so cruel to me?

-

Naruto and I are meant to be, just look at the stars and it will spell it out clearly for you. Read the book of fate and ask a crazy old gypsy women at a carnival and she will tell you how me and my beloved are meant to be!! I have now come to the conclusion that Sasuke is interested in my Naruto, but who wouldn't be? My Naruto is the most beautiful creature alive. It is fate that many people will look upon my Naruto and fall madly in love with him. But it is just lust. Fate knows that my love is true and it is not just lustful thoughts about him, fate is on my side, fate is-

"WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!!" Shouted a fortune teller walking down the street, "YOU ARE THE MOST ANNOYING GIRLY-BOY I HAVE EVER HAD THE MISSPLEASURE OF PASSING BY!!" Shouted the angry fortune teller, punching me right in the face. As I fell to the cold ground, one thought passed my mind:

_Why does this keep happening?_

-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Hey guys, I'm sorry if that wasn't to good, I have writers block right now and it sucks 'cause I have two other series to write for (by the way, writing three series at a time, not one of my best ideas) and I also have an English exam in about three hours, heh. But I hope you enjoyed my story anyways. I tried to make it funny and I just hope I managed to get a few giggles out of you. Please review! And ideas would be nice to, it might make the writers block go away!

Also, I just gotta say sorry to htotheizzo, I promised I would embarrass Neji as much as possible, but sadly the ideas were just not popping up. Oh and thanks Mrs.NarutoUzumaki for all of your reviews.


	7. More competition!

**Summer Lovin' **

_More competition?! _

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: So I have been having my exams lately so I haven't been popping stories like I used to be. But next week after it's over I will have lots more time to digest my creativeness and-

**Chains**: Don't finish that line

**Rayzo**: That's disgusting

**Chaos**: Gross, Kiri-Kiri, there are children reading this!

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Wha? I was just gunna say "type my little heart out"

**Chains & Rayzo & Chaos**: Oh…

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: weirdoes

-

**Summary**: Let me introduce to you Sai.

-

Naruto's face has gone bright red and he and I sit with my brother. Oh god, this is just . . . this is just not right!! My brother, the evil plotting man, decided that he should give Naruto and me _the_ talk!! Naruto didn't know half the things my brother was talking about so he had to explain them in _detail_ and he also told _his_ sexual stories. Why does life suck, God? Please explain because I feel like I might cry for two reasons! One Naruto is just so cute when he blushes and I just _want_ to fuck him so hard, plus it would be very education for the blond, he will understand more of what Itachi is talking about then. Second, Itachi is telling us about _his_ sex life, erm EW!!! So very, very wrong.

"-And Sasuke has some of those _toys_ up in his room actually." Oh shit!! I missed what he said, toys? Oh- crap!

"S-sorry Sasuke." Naruto mumbled, most of his face hidden by his hands. But it was still so obvious he was blushing like a mad person. Do they blush? "I didn't mean t-to l-l-look a-at-" Naruto couldn't finish was he was saying, apparently the embarrassment level was far to high for my blue eyed love.

"It's okay Naruto." I mumbled out, looking far away from his eyes now feeling strangely guilty, I felt like I was an evil man that tainted an innocent soul.

"What are you boys talking about, hm?" I glared at Itachi, he was probably making Naruto feeling worse, damn bastard.

"I have to go Sasuke." Naruto mumbled, not looking at me and I started to feel a whole lot worse. I feel like I raped him! I didn't though; he didn't know what he was playing with! Neji will probably love this!! He will go comfort Naruto and then – and then they will – they will - . . . it's too sickening to think about it!!

"You don't have to Naruto." Actually, I was feeling pretty awkward around him right now. I mind raped him!! Oh Naruto, will you forgive me?

_Sasuke's inner Thoughts_:

"Naruto, forgive me my love!" i hold Naruto close to me; his face berried in my chest as he cries his cute little heart out. He looks up at me, his eyes red and puffy and looking so _fuckable_.

"I will always forgive Sasuke." He stands on his tip toes and brushes his lips against mine and then I pull him close and

**Censored due to content **

_End inner Thoughts_

"No, I really should. I'm meeting someone and I want to look my best-" _Sasuke stops listening about here_

Meeting someone? L-like a date…? With someone that isn't an Uchiha? Namely me!! No, it can't be, Naruto wouldn't do that to me!! He wouldn't!!

I won't believe it!!

No, no, no, no, no!! Oh god no!!!!!!!! Naruto, is it true? Do you like someone else? Maybe it's just that Haku _guy_? Yea, probably just Haku, and Haku has a boyfriend! But I haven't met any of his other friends, maybe its someone who likes Naruto! What will I do if they make a move on poor innocent Naruto?!?

_Sasuke's inner Thoughts:_

"NOOOOOO, PLEASE STOP, I BEG YOU insert name here" Naruto is being held down by a thug with tattoos and ugly scars all over his body.

"Hahahaha, nobody can stop me now, if only you had stayed with Sasuke!" Insert name here rips Naruto's clothes off reliving Naruto's soft beautifully tanned skin, "Your mine now, Slave! MWHAHAHAHA!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooo………………….."

_End inner Thoughts_

"No, Naruto don't go!!" Oops, I just screamed that out didn't i?

"You can come if-"

"Yes." I nod my head calmly, now I can protect my love with my life! Well, not my life, I mean, I'm only 16, I don't want to die _yet_, I guess I'll just throw a tomato at him or something. . . . But I really like tomatoes. . .

-

Naruto and i are sitting in a café by the sea, he is talking to me about . . . something. Hey, I'm busy planning way to protect _my_ Naruto encase insert name here tries anything to hurt my fucking love!

"Don't you agree Sasuke?" Naruto looks at me with a huge grin, Awww, he is so _cute_!!

"Of course I do." I'll agree with anything you say, you adorable little fox you!

Wasn't Naruto's friend supposed to be here by 2pm? It 2:35pm damnit!! I don't have all day to wait around all day for someone I don't know and will probably hate. I hate everyone, expect Naruto. I love Naruto, I want to fuck him.

I wonder if he will go into the toilets with me so I can fuck his cute little non-existent brain out. Hmm, that sounds good. Maybe I should just take him home so I can bring out some of those _toys_ he seemed to like so much. Itachi gave me a few ideas on what I can do to Naruto and I can demonstrate what doing 69 is. Heh, I'm sure he will just _love_ it. Naruto looks like one of those people that cry the first time you _stick_ it in them. Oh, I hope he does. I'll lick away his tears and then – then – then – too much for brain-!!

_ORGASM_!!!

"Naruto, I'll be right back, k?" He nods his head and I stand up, but when I do Naruto stands up and runs into the arms of some _person_ screaming the name "Sai" whoever this 'Sai' person is, better not try to come on to my Naruto. I turn and look at the guy and I suddenly feel like I have met him before. Oh yea, the mirror! The guy looks like me! Freaky.

He isn't as good looking as I am of course, and his smile seems _very_ fake, but still, he looks like me, which is weird. . . .

"It has been ages Naruto." Sai says, his hand slowly heading towards Naruto's ass, _my_ ass!! Yes, his ass belongs to me!!

"And I still want to see your penis, Naruto." Wha-?! WHAT?!?!?!

WHAT DID THAT FUCKTARD JUST SAY TO _MY_ NARUTO?!?!?!

"Sai, stop being weird." Naruto mumbled out, a blush on his face. A blush that only _I_ should be able to make him blush!! Okay, that didn't make scene but I don't care!! I'm a crazed man right now so _back off!!_

"But you know I _love_ you Naru-baby." Must. Kill. Freak!!

"And I love you to, Sai."

….. What?

Did I just hear the sound of my heart breaking?

-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: I am really sorry about this chapter for people who keep getting alerts. I have been having some trouble with it. I don't know why chapter 6 keeps replacing it!!


	8. Realization

**Summer Lovin' **

**Realization **

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: You know, I have been telling some people lies, like what might happen in my stories, heh evil.

**Victim: **Lying is wrong Kiri-Kiri-Sama

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Oh well, it's just a little bad karma.

**Chains**: Saturday Night alright (for fighting)

**Rayzo**: What?

**Chaos**: Nickleback

**Chains**: Well done

-

**Summary**: its times like this you really regret falling in love with an idiot.

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Oh, did I mention that this is the last one? Hahahaha, I guess not.

-

"And I love you to, Sai."

….. What?

Did I just hear the sound of my heart breaking?

He loves that guy?

I'm going to go down to the beach and dig a whole in the sand so I can live there forever! And then the craps will come eat me alive! Yep, that is my fate; I guess I should go do that now 'cause Naruto is with that _guy_! Who I hate by the way, a kind of hate that runs so deep down, a kind of hate that is white hot and makes me do and say things I really regret, like right now for instants.

"You love him, Naruto?! What about me?!?"

"Of course I love you to, Sasuke." Huh? He loves me?! YAY!! YES!! THIS IS AWESOME!!! But, I'm not gong to share you Naruto, get rid of the freak so we can go have some private time, "You're my best friend." Oh, the dreaded 'best friend'. Doesn't it just _suck_ when the person you're lusting after says you're their 'best friend'? "So is Sai, you're both my very best friends." Whoa, thank God, I never really wanted to live in the sand and slowly be consumed by craps anyway.

"Hey Naruto, sometimes your so stupid." Sai said happily with that fucked up smile of his and Naruto isn't stupid, you freak!! He is just a bit mentally challenged!

"What do you mean Sai?" Naruto asks, tilted his head to the side in confusion, looking so cute!

"Sasuke doesn't love you at all." WHAT?!?! WHAT DID THAT FREAK JUST SAY?!?! Okay, I admit that I don't actually **love** Naruto, but I do like him a lot. Mostly I just want to fuck the blond. "He just wants to fuck you."

Oh

Shit

That dude just read my mind and _said_ it to Naruto and Naruto looks so hurt as he turns to me, man, I hate this guy! Everything was going _perfect_ before he came along!!

"Do you, Sasuke?" I really want to lie to him and tell him that I am completely in love with him and don't have a single lustful thought about him. But, for some reason when I look into his blue eyes I just can't do it. So I just look away from him and sigh. "Bastard." He mumbles, and I can practically _hear_ the tears that are running down his face before he runs off.

"Why did you have to do that?!" I shouted at Sai, I hate this guy even more now! He made _my_ Naruto cry!! "You made him cry!"

"Actually, you made him cry."

Tch, fucker.

-

This day couldn't get any worse, first I met that asshole (Sai), then I made Naruto cry and last (but not least) it took me one hour to get home!

Not a good day at all.

"Sasuke," My father is looking at me, his eyes shining with 'im-so-great', Itachi's eyes do that a lot to and I've been told I do it also. But really, I am so great. "We are leaving tomorrow night-"

What?

B-but we cant!! I- we- NARUTO!!! No, if I leave him now I will never get to tell him I actually _do_ love him!

…..

Whoa, where did that come from? Oh crap, I actually love him don't i? For god sakes! Why does my life suck right now? I blame Itachi, that plotting bastard. I really wish we never came on this holiday.

The sun has probably gone to my head, that's why I'm acting so weird and thinking strange things like I actually _love_ the blond. I mean, sure I'm gunna miss his cuteness and fuckableness, but that's it. I wont miss his smile or laugh or the way he is just so god damn innocent. Or that he is so trusting and kind and-

I'm just gunna stop.

"Leaving, huh?" I mumble at my father, who was speaking the whole time while I ignored him, looked at me oddly. "That's kind of sad." I walk away from him up to my room, sometimes; life can really be a cruel bitch.

-

**Kiri-kiri-chan**: You think I'm gunna be cruel and not let them get together right? Well you will be 100 percent-

-

"So your leaving tomorrow?" Neji asked me, we were both sitting in my room in complete silence until he decided he needed to break it. "Fate – we must all follow our paths in life." Why was he even in my room? "But-" He sighed, "Sometimes we must break our destined paths and make new roads." Was he high? "Maybe Naruto and I were never meant to be." Whatever gave you that idea? "Naruto likes you."

"He does?!" Since when?

"It's kind of obvious, don't you think?" Great, now I'm as mentally challenged as the blond. How wonderful. "You like him to." Yes, I like – maybe love – him a lot. But like hell I'm telling Neji that. "Your leaving soon-" 7 hours to be exact "-Maybe you should go talk to him." But he hates me. "He doesn't hate you-" is he reading my mind? "-He couldn't hate anyone."

Again I ask; why is Neji in my room?

"Sasuke-" Itachi barges into my room, "I am a great big brother-" yeah, and im a panda, "-I got you _something_ you _love_." What do I love? "Come in _Naruto_-"

Oh

Fuck

"I brought him over so you can confess your undying love, Little brother." Do not kill brother. Remember what that will lead to?! The same as if I killed Neji

Jail

Guy named Peaches

BUTT RAPE!!

"H-hey Sasuke." I am actually kind of thankful Itachi brought Naruto over, "Your brother kidnapped me and brought me here." Maybe not. . . .

Okay ladies and gents, here is the moment of truth. The time has come where I, Sasuke Uchiha, do something I don't find myself doing a lot. I am going to –"I'm sorry, Naruto."

Yes, you heard it right. I wont repeat myself so don't ask.

"What did you just say?" Damnit Naruto! I glare at Itachi and Neji, who seem to be enjoying the show. Erm, LEAVE!!

"Could you give us some privacy?" I ask, order. Whatever.

"I don't know brother, you won't try to rape little Naruto will you-"

"OUT!!"

Why the hell did my parents insist on keeping that guy? He is such a fucking asshole.

So after a bit of swearing (mostly on my part), a few death treats (again, mostly on my part) and after i got my mother to force Itachi and Neji out of my room, I finally got to talk to Naruto alone. He is sitting on my bed (I'm trying not to have naughty thoughts) and nibbling at his lip nervously (I cant stop the naughty thoughts from _coming_)

"Naruto-" Before I get to finish what I'm saying, Naruto…..kissed me. Just a really small sweet kiss on the lips and it feels like it is full of love. How, I don't know. But I don't question it. It is- beautiful. I am being quite poetic today. When he pulls back there is a slight blush on his checks and he seems a little breathless.

Awww, Naruto.

"I like you." He mumbled, his eyes looking everywhere but at my face. I can understand, I would probably do the same thing if I was him. But, because I'm not I do something else.

"Yeah?" I smile at him and grab his jaw so he is now looking at me with those big blue eyes of his, "Well I love you." And I kiss him hard on the mouth.

Aren't I just the romantic?

-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Okay, it's not the last one. I lied!! Mwha, next one should be out soon.

This one wasn't that funny, but oh well. I hope you enjoyed it.


	9. Popping my Lemon Cherry

**Summer Lovin' **

_Popping my Lemon Cherry _

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Okay, so some people want a lemon, I wrote a story to test my lemon writing skills and I got lots of good feedback from it so I'm hoping that it won't turn out to bad. I have confidence (sorta) that it won't turn out too boring or repetitive. No No 22-chan has faith in me! D

**Chains: **Knowing you though, you'll somehow turn it into a big joke

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: You have so little faith in me

**Rayzo**: Of course we do

**Chaos**: Yeah, no offence

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Offence taken

**Victim**: Well I have faith in you Kiri-Kiri-Sama

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Yay!!

-

**Summary**: I'm popping my Lemon cherry - again

-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Hey, well before I write the actual story I'm gunna write a little side story for one of the fans of the story, Naruto's girl.

**Side Story: Your lips are mine! **

"Who are you?" Naruto asked with a gasped as he laid eyes on the _beauty_ that is-

"Does it matter Naruto?! We are meant to be!" She screamed at him, love pouring out of every word she spoke.

"Well, I just meet you-"

"Naruto, I love you!!!" She ran to Naruto with her arms out screeched and her lips ready to capture his.

"Wha- hmpf!" Was all he could say as she tackled him to the ground and captured his lips in a spicy hot kiss.

**Side Story: Your lips are mine! – The End**

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: So that was my 100 word story involving Naruto's girl. Anyway, should we get to the story?

-

Naruto is looking up at me, his checks blushing and his eyes filled with so much love and trust – man, I so want to fuck him right now!

"Sasuke." Naruto lends up and kisses my lips, his arms wrapping themselves around my neck so he can move himself in my lap. As he kisses me so softly on my lips he starts to rock back and forth on my lap – oh dear God - he can't, I mean, hes so innocent – but, hes moaning and – im so fucking hard!! Where did he learn how to do this?! He is a virgin right? I hope he- Ah, oh god, so good!! "I wanna fuck you." He whispers as he palls back, a smirk on his face. He did just say that right? He did, didn't he?!?!

He pushes me down on the bed and looks at me with such a sexy look that I think I might just burst.

Oh – god! Naruto, you are rubbing me so good – er! Oh so good! Harder-

-

Sasuke isn't in the right frame of mind, so the author will have to write this in normal POV **sigh**

-

Naruto slowly takes off his orange shirt and throws it to the floor; his hands make their way to Sasuke's chest and slowly unbutton the white shirt to reveal Sasuke's toned stomach. Naruto lends down and nibbles on Sasuke's neck, causing the Uchiha to gasp and grab a handful of golden hair. Naruto rubs himself against Sasuke harder and feels Sasuke's hips start to move with the blonds', Sasuke's slim legs warp around Naruto's waist, trying to get some more friction between them. The blond slowly started to kiss his way down his lover's chest until he reached a hard pink nipple and runs the tip of his tongue along it. Dark black eyes close and he bites his lips to stop himself moaning to loudly from the blonds actions. But as the blond bites down on Sasuke's sensitive nipple he cant hold the moans in any longer and lets out a loud whine of pleasure.

"N-Naruto!!" Sasuke tries to hold in the screams that are begging to flood out from his open mouth. The blond ran his tongue down Sasuke's body agonisingly slow until his face was between Sasuke's legs. The Uchiha was still lifting his groin up in the hair slightly, trying to feel any pressure at all to get rid of the ache in his pants. Sasuke tangled his fingers in the black sheets of his bed as he felt the little blond rub his groin threw his tightening shorts.

"Take them off." Naruto asked sweetly, a smile on his tanned face. Sasuke didn't need to be told twice as he ripped them off and threw them to the floor, Naruto smiled at him and bent his head down to look at Sasuke's impressive member. The pre-cum that leaked out of Sasuke looked very tasty to Naruto as he ran his tongue over the head of Sasuke's cock, "Your yummy, Sasuke." Naruto whispered over Sasuke's heavy breathing and groans of need. Naruto licked down Sasuke's penis and sucked the sides of it.

Sasuke didn't know how much more he could take as Naruto did these things to him, and they had only just began. All thought left Sasuke's mind when he felt a warm mouth take the head of his cock and slowly make its way down. The Uchiha hissed as the burning pleasure of Naruto's hot mouth and his wet tongue.

"I-I'm gunna-!" He hissed in displeasure as Naruto squeezed his dick to prevent his orgasm.

"Ne, Sasuke, that's not very fair," The blond pouted a he let go of Sasuke's throbbing cock, "You haven't done anything to me yet." The blond complained, he moved back onto Sasuke's hips and rubbed himself against the Uchiha as hard as he could, the blond moaned out, his blue eyes locked with black. "I'm so hard." The blond whispered and ran his fingers over Sasuke's parted lips. "So – hard." He breathed the words, his finger's going in Sasuke's mouth so the Uchiha could suck them, "All my clothes are still on while your so naked – Sasuke." The blond lifted his hips up and bounced up and down on Sasuke's groin. Drool ran from Sasuke's mouth and covered the tanned fingers that he sucked.

Naruto moved his fingers out of his raven haired lover's mouth and got up from the bed to remove the rest of his offending clothes. "Ne, Sasuke, bend over."

-

And we go back to Sasuke's POV

-

It just hit me; I'm the uke – me – Sasuke Uchiha! Naruto is the seme! How can this be, Naruto was so uke! But now – hes – Seme. . . . And I'm not.

-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: You thought Naruto would be uke, didn't you? Well you were wrong! Mwhahahaha! Evil little me!

Okay, I am really sorry that it is so short, I really wanted to make it longer, but I am really busy and don't have that much time to update so I just want to get as much done as I possibly can right now. The next one will be longer because – IT'S THE LAST ONE!!!

It really is going to be the last one, and Sasuke leaves Naruto!! What will happen though?


	10. Sayonara

**Summer Lovin': The Final**

_Sayonara_

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: I hate to say it but I am actually quite glad this is over.

**Rayzo**: Why do you say that?

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Well now I have more time to concentrate on my other stories.

Man I took on way too much. But still, I'm kind of sad that this is the last

Chapter and there will be NO sequel, sorry kids.

**Victim**: Another lie that you have told, Kiri-Kiri-Sama

Kiri-Kiri-Sama: Well, I'm sorry. But there won't be a sequel.

Chains: Anyway, we want to thank all those who reviewed, added the story to

Their favourites, and added it to their alerts.

**Chaos**: Well love you all!

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan & Chains & Chaos & Rayzo & Victim**: Sayonara

-

Summary: It was good to know someone as stupid as you.

-

"N-Naruto-" Sasuke bit into his lip. His head was resting on the pillow and his fingers tangled in the sheets. He tried hard not to scream out loud. Just because he was on bottom didn't mean he would act like a uke, so he tried keeping all the moans and the 'it hurts' locked up inside of him. But Sasuke was finding it increasingly hard to keep it all in.

"Sorry Sasuke-" The blond panted as he slowly slid himself into Sasuke, "This is my first time; I really don't want to hurt you, but you really are t-!"

"Shut up!" Sasuke moaned at the blond, not wanting to hear just how tight he may or may not be. Sasuke's lip started to drip blood as he felt the blonds' hand stroke his erection and his soft lips touch his neck. The pleasure of it was driving him overboard but the pain of the blond sliding himself into Sasuke's ass was taking him away from the immense pleasure the Naruto was causing. He wasn't even fully in yet!

"Sasuke-" Sasuke onyx eyes looked up at Naruto's deep blue eyes, "scream for me." Sasuke couldn't deny the simple request. Sure all the things Naruto was doing made him want to scream out loud, but when the blond asked him to stop holding it all in, he just let it all go, moans, groans and all. As the blond slid fully into Sasuke, he let out a painful gasp of air and closed his eyes tightly, hoping maybe that would make the pain go away, sadly it didn't.

"I-i-m sorry, Sasuke." Naruto mumbled as he licked away at Sasuke's neck and kept his fingers around his dick, trying to get rid of the pain for Sasuke. It wasn't working as well as he was hoping. He waited until he thought Sasuke was ready for the blond to start moving again, not wanting to hurt his lover more than he already was. When he finally felt Sasuke relax he slowly pulled away and slid back down again.

-

Sasuke's point of view!

-

Oh god, this is, this is so good! But it hurts at the same time so I'm a little confused. Maybe Naruto has done this before, but I cant, "Ahh! Oh god- ahh! Naruto!" I can understand why the ukes are always blushing so bloody much. It is so embarrassing to whine and moan like this, but , it is so good, so right now

I don't give a damn!

"Mm Sasuke!" Well Naruto seems to be enjoying himself too.

-

Normal point of view

-

Naruto's speed started to pick up, and he started too slide in harder. Sasuke would have asked the blond to slow down, but after a few moments of pain, it started to subside and only his pleasure was left. He wanted more. He wanted

Naruto to go harder and faster, but he could tell Naruto was still a bit hesitant. If Naruto didn't start slamming himself into Sasuke soon, the Uchiha knew he would make a complete fool of himself, but, as Naruto hit something deep inside Sasuke, all reason and pride in Sasuke was thrown out the window.

"Fuck Naruto, go faster!" he screamed at the blond who instantly obeyed. His hand

tightened around Sasuke's cock, and he pumped harder.

It all happened in seconds.

It felt like Sasuke would explode, he felt like a huge weight was desperately trying to escape from him.

He closed his eyes. The moans were becoming louder, more lustful. He felt Naruto going harder, much harder. He felt the blond jerk him off faster. He felt the blonds' hand entwine with Sasuke's, and the bites on his neck become slightly harsher, not that the Uchiha was complaining.

Then it hit him very, very hard.

"I'm gunna cum!" He screamed out, most of his words muffled by the pillow he dug his head in. It all came out in that second, Sasuke had never felt anything like it. He had had sex before, but compared to the orgasms he had before, they were nothing. They barely left even half of the burning hot feeling that was consuming his body completely right now.

But as soon as it came, it left, leaving Sasuke to bask in the after-glow. A few more thrusts from Naruto, and he felt his own orgasm flood his body, engulfing him in sheer pleasure.

Heavy breathing and flesh meeting flesh were the only things left in the room as

Naruto still thrust in and out of Sasuke very slowly and tiredly. Then he slid out of him, and rolled on the other side of the bed, looking up at the ceiling, his face red and flushed.

Sasuke laid down on the bed, his eyes still wide and his mouth still partly open and panting. Naruto looked deep into Sasuke eyes and smiled deeply. "Thanks."

-

Back to Sasuke's mind

-

Thank you! That was. . . Amazing! How could that be Naruto's first time?!

Naruto sits up, and pulls at my arm to do the same, so I slowly sit up. My ass hurts like a bitch, but I don't regret it at all.

"Thank you." Naruto mumbles to me again and leans in for a deep kiss. His tongue touching mine, my hand goes to the back of his head as I try to deepen the kiss.

Naruto lifts himself into my lap and wraps his arms around my waist. I like this kiss, maybe even more than the kiss we shared that was filled with raw lust because this kiss is filled with love. I really love him. Fuck, I love him so much! He pulls away from me, a thin silver line of saliva connecting us before it slowly cascades away. "I love you, Sasuke," he whispers in my ear, and he tucks his head under my chin as I hold him tightly in my arms.

"I love you too, Naruto." I whisper back to him.

-

-

You know, I feel like dirt. I feel like I should be punished, and in a way I guess I should. Looking into Naruto's sad eyes you would feel the same way. I forgot to mention to him that I was leaving today, but in all honesty, I completely forgot. So now, I'm by my car, my bags in the back and ready to leave while Naruto tries to look away from me and give me a happy smile, but it's completely fake. There are tears running down his face so it's a dead give away.

"I-I-I-I'll miss y-y-y-you S-S-S-Sasuke!" He cries out, trying to wipe the tears away. I'm gunna miss my idiot. I feel like someone just ripped my heart out and threw it at an old, hungry homeless man.

"I'll miss you too, Naruto." He moves into my arms and I hold him tight. I asked my parents if I could stay here, but they wouldn't allow it. So here I am, holding a crying Naruto while my brother looks at his pink nails, and my father cries that both his sons are gay and he will never get a grandchild while my mother pops another pill and puts her head phones on, listening to Britney Spears. I want to stay with Naruto!

"Get in the car, Sasuke!" My father shouts at me. I wish it would start to rain; it usually does in the movies, but, this isn't fiction (**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Of course not), it's real life, and the clouds won't suddenly cover the bright blue sky and start to pour like god firing bullets down on us.

"Sasuke!" He chokes out; begging me to stay and I honestly wish I could. I am so sorry Naruto. "I love you."

"I love you too, Naruto," and I kiss his lips, not in a hard or passionate kiss, but a soft one filled with love.

"Sayonara, Sasuke." My blond-haired, blue-eyed, ramen loving, uke-looking Naruto whispers into my ear.

"Sayonara," I didn't think this would be so hard, but it hurts, it hurts so fucking much, and I just want to hold him and never let go, "Naruto." I open the door to our car and slip in. I keep looking at Naruto as we leave, as the car drives away and even when Naruto goes out of sight, I still look out the window. I didn't know it would hurt this much.

-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Yep, so that's the end, no more Summer Lovin'. Sniggers But I lie once again!!

-

Epilogue

The first day of school always sucks: First, I must fight my way threw my fangirls. They are some crazy girls, and they cam sometimes get violent.

Shikamaru, my best friend, once actually got his lazy ass up to try and help me, but he got a broken arm. So yeah, I'm on my own now. fuck-in-hell!! Who just ripped my t-shirt! That's it, now I'm angry!

I push my way to threw the crowd and get ready to blow my lungs out to every fangirl to leave me the hell alone!

"Wow, he sure does have a lot of fangirls!" Yes, I know, and they stalk me to-

Wait! I know that voice!! I turn round, slowly, like in slow motion and see him-

Rock Lee . . . ?

Oh wait, Naruto is next to him, whoa, thank god!

"Naruto?" I'm not imagining things am i? Naruto is there? Right?!

"I missed you SO MUCH SASUKE!" He runs towards me and tackles me to the ground.

"Did you miss me?" Naruto tilts his head to the side. Aw, hes so cute! I don't say anything; I just grab his chin and pull him down onto my waiting lips! My fangirls are either crying or having Nosebleeds, but hey, I don't care. I got some nice piece of ass right here to keep me occupied.

"So, is that your summer love Sasuke?" Shikamaru asks from behind me. How he got there, I do not know. I look up at him from where I am on the floor and smirk.

Naruto looks up at Shikamaru and shouts:

"It's way more than just Summer Lovin'!"

-

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: Finished! Thank you for all your love and reviews! I hope you enjoyed my story and I hope you go read my others!! Big smile

**Rayzo**: It has been a pleasure

**Chains**: Later

**Victim**: I haven't been here long, but thank you.

**Chaos**: I ain't no hollaback girl, I ain't no hollaback girl!

**Kiri-Kiri-Chan**: PEACE!!


End file.
